


my very own constellation

by dizzy



Series: road trip mix tape 2016 (aka, the tour fics) [14]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, unabashedly happy fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-18
Updated: 2016-11-18
Packaged: 2018-08-31 18:35:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8589319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: Five days in Los Angeles.





	

California tastes like summer and feels like homesickness bundled up confusingly with a strange sort of relief. 

"You and your sugary drinks," Dan says, the smack of pineapple lingering on his lips after a brief kiss from Phil. 

It was a playful kiss, stolen by an empty poolside. 

"It's tasty," Phil says. He tips it toward Dan. "What if I share?" 

Dan smiles faintly. "No thanks." 

Phil grins at him with his lips around the straw. 

*

Dan just wants to sleep. 

"I just want to sleep," he says to Phil. 

He's naked in bed, watching Phil do his hair. Phil is half dressed. His back is long and pale and dotted with little freckles and moles. Dan turns his face into the pillow and bites back a whine. He wants to stay in bed, he wants to sleep, and he wants Phil to do the same. 

"We made plans," Phil says. 

Everything feels a little bit harder right now. Surviving is a little bit harder, like it sometimes is when things get too messy in Dan's head. 

"I just..." Dan sighs. "Cuddle? Please?"

Phil puts the straighteners down, carefully ensuring they won't catch anything on fire. He turns and looks at Dan, looks and looks so long Dan starts to feel uncomfortable, then he gets up and walks over to the bed and lays down by Dan. "Fine. Cuddles it is."

Dan doesn't need any further invitation to sprawl himself over Phil, sighing in a deeply contented way as he smushes his cheek against Phil's chest. Phil's fingers pet his hair down flat before his hand comes to rest cupping the back of Dan's head. 

Dan's eyes slide shut. He can feel himself moving with every breath Phil takes. He fumbles for the blanket and pulls it over both of them, letting his fist clench into it. 

"Just for a bit," Phil says. 

*

They have sex in the shower, because Dan is fascinated by the mirrors and Phil indulges him far too much, sometimes to their detriment. 

But somehow despite lanky limbs and a lack of coordination, they survive. Afterward they towel dry and kiss and touch some more, soaking in the renewed energy that comes with being alone, together, unwinding. 

Dan wants a memento of the moment. With Phil's chin propped on his shoulder from behind and Phil's arms around his middle, Dan finds an angle that obscures their faces and takes one photo of the handprints he left on the steamed up glass before they fade. 

*

"Your face is... my favorite face," Phil says, drawing the words out loud. 

Dan laughs and puts a hand on Phil's shoulder. "Drunk you is my favorite you." 

They're both dressed up in smart button ups and the pants that aren't faded from hundreds of washes. Phil looks especially nice and Dan's felt more himself today than any day since Phil left their flat two weeks ago. 

Home soon. Home, together, soon. 

"I'm not drunk," Phil says. He leans in like he's whispering something to Dan. "I'm just happy." 

Dan smiles. 

*

"We could, you know," Phil says. "If you wanted."

Dan's holding Phil's phone, reading the DM conversation. He can tell by the thread of restraint running through Phil's surface-polite response that he doesn't really want to. 

It wouldn't be first on Dan's list of Los Angeles tourist activities, either. But the message still needs a response. They've drawn this out for days. "Just a drink." 

"If you wanted," Phil repeats. 

Chris used to be a friend, but that feels like a lifetime ago. The part of Dan that feels like a different person almost wants to know if Chris is a different person, too. He might, he thinks, have that drink - in a different time, in a different place. But right now doesn't feel like the time to open that door again. 

And Phil doesn't want to. Phil just doesn't want to be the one to say no. Phil doesn't want to decide that. 

If Dan needs to take the bullet for them, he will. "I'd rather not." 

*

They turn down three breakfast invitations and spend their last morning in Los Angeles eating pancakes in bed and watching crappy American television. 

Once the food is eaten Phil tries to pry him out of bed. Ten minutes later, Dan is on his phone watching Phil try and throw their suitcases back into some kind of order. 

"We are a cliche of a stereotype of ourselves," Dan says, looking at Phil's plate of mostly-eaten pancakes and the syrup stain on the duvet. He looks back over at where Phil is gathering up Dan's clothes. "Fold that shirt nicely, please, I might wear it tomorrow." 

(The name Phil calls him in response does not fit the stereotype.)

*

The flight is long. Dan's legs are cramped despite the supposed roominess of upgraded seating, and his headphones make his ears feel sweaty so he's declined a third film in favor of the two of them just sitting quietly, occasionally talking. 

"Landing soon," Phil says, looking over at the window. 

The view is cloudy and gray, landscape dominated by buildings. It's familiar, beautiful in a way that has nothing to do with aesthetics and everything to do with home.

**Author's Note:**

> [read and reblog on tumblr](http://slightlydizzier.tumblr.com/post/153356914829/title-my-very-own-constellation-rating-teen-word)
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> and this has nothing to do with my fic but I just love it a lot so [consider this both an art rec and me acknowledging that when I write Dan and Phil cuddling this is what I picture now](https://twitter.com/flamemanged/status/796631788290527232)


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